If you are anything like me you were a wonderful mother before you had children. You would roll your eyes at a screaming child in the grocery store, you would make a mental note never to let your child make a mess at a restaurant and you have all your disciplining techniques down pat. Well, after these two kids have shot through my womb my story has changed...considerably.
As a new mom with only one kid mind you, I was on a quest to be this perfect mom. I was determined my child would always listen to me, my child would never throw a fit in a store and my child would NEVER leave a mess in a restaurant (I was a waitress in college and had to clean up after many a little darling). So when Emerson reached the age where she was eating Cherrios, Puffs and the like I decided to take a miniature sweeper and dust pan to restaurants with me. I would bend down at the end of a meal and get to work. I look back at that pathetic woman now and wonder who is she? and why didn't someone smack her?
This brings me to today. We had just left Little Gym and I decided we would venture to the grocery store. So I had thought ahead a packed snacks and drinks. Snacks and drinks are great distracters. My kids might be on The Biggest Loser in 18 years, but whatever, I need to shop. So half way through the shopping ordeal Emerson decides she no longer wants her snack. I take her bowl and place it in the cupholder. However, the bowl is too fat so I just set it on top of the cup holder balancing it ever so delicately. Needless to say while I was mulling over which diced tomatoes to buy I knocked the stupid bowl over. Cherries, peanuts, raisins and goldfish flew every which way. Oh, no! What to do? Two options rapidly came to mind. I could walk away and pretend I didn't do it or I could painstakingly get on my hands and knees picking up every last crumb. And then reality hit. You have two kids who are close to nap time. If you pick up the mess you just lost 2-3 minutes of precious shopping time. So I chose to forgo the diced tomatoes and get out of Dodge before someone without children spotted me and passed judgement adding this scene to their list of not to do's as a parent!